STUDIO83

Sooo...Ekasie Stories: the Secret. How are about that? Firstly, I want to biggup the actors. They have balls (yes, pun). Assuming they are not gay in real, it would take obese testicles to write yourself off in South African society's eyes as all manner of derogatory term. Anyway, that's not the point of the post. Today, class, we are going to be talking about: In a Committed Relationship (CR): how long is too long without sex? How much sex is too much sex? Even better, what are the consequences of such?

I say CR because, if you are single and you are not getting laid, then you done did it to yourself. My religious friends and those saving themselves for marriage can sit this one out, thanks. There too many variables in a single person's life as to why their sexual appetites are met or not. I mean flip, even Quasimodo scored a girl. Anyway, I digress. Now to start off with, the first question is; how much sex is too little sex between a committed couple? Commitment here is key, I'll explain why later. I did a quick survey on my Facebook page and went around and asked a few friends and acquaintances. According the results, a month would be pushing it. The thing about sex is that one can go their whole life without it, if you've never had it. But, if you've have shagged before, you know the burn in your loins never really goes away. The proverbial once you start poppin' you never stopping'

So the next question is; what do you do when you and your partner are not compatible in terms of Le Libido?

THE CAMEL
So your last person was a reasonable twice or three times a week type. Then you find out that the new arrival is a camel. With two humps they can traverse vast periods of drought without so much as an itch in their crotch. They have you seeing mirages because you are so horny. Parched and starving, you are told to bear with them, "you know this really new to me, I appreciate your understanding, love", peck on the cheek, rolls over.

THE NYMPHO
An over-grown rabbit on steroids is all up in you the minute you step inside the door. It was amazing at first. Bloody mind blowing, actually. But you mind can only explode so many times. There's a scene in the movie "Ray" when Ray, played by Jammie Foxx, is hiding in the bathroom because there's a burly nympho in the other room sucking the life out of him, literally. You barely get any sleep. You walk around with a crotch that feels like it works at a Chinese factory. At times, it's down right painful. But baby loves you and you are just so irresistible.

What happens when you can no longer stand your partners approach to sex? Some would say adapt. If you care for that person you will try to accommodate their needs or the lack thereof. But, going back to my survey, if your "screw this" threshold is a month and you are currently on three, then what. If twice a day is insanity, then what?

To the Camel Rider, do you go visit Mrs Palm and her five daughter? Or do go get fresh batteries and buzz your brains out? To the Rabbit Keeper, do buy lube in bulk or stock up on Viagra (or Rocky…lol)? Remember I spoke about COMMITMENT? Now, say YOU are the camel, has the thought of turning a blind eye to how exactly your partner is busting their nut. Would you let your partner cheat, knowing that you cannot satisfy them but they always come back home and treat you lovingly? Or if you are the Nympho, do you plead your case and detail how sex is just sex (see article here).

Many a guy will say you can never have too much sex. Lies. We all have our limits. Besides, popular beliefs are never as real in the bed chamber as they are in the protection of one's ego in social circles. What do you when the person you love does not satisfy you sexually. Or what if your partner has a sexual hunger of Somalian proportions? Even kinkier, what has this led you to do?

Photography: Neil Acid Words: Vus